Today, a hardcore vegan screamed to the sky in Anguish...

Maybe. Well, I’d like to think so. They would’ve if they ever stepped foot in a Korean Barbeque place in Japan anyways. Today, instead of cooking a big fuck off meal as okaasan usually does (though I love her regardless of her trying to turn me into a Thanksgiving turkey) we went to a Korean Barbeque place Japanese style! I’ve never even had a Korean bbq American style so all in all it would be an interesting experience. I figured that since we were at a restaurant I could control my portions and since I’d told otoosan (my Japanese dad) that I had a test to study for Monday morning things would be light and quick.

But apparently, my Japanese must be really off because my Otoosan took that as “order the host daughter beer in a tall ass mug”. Oh dear…and since I struggle with saying “no” to anything I’m offered because I don’t want to offend my family (because it’s something very easy to do in Japan) I accepted it graciously and drank away. Then the piles of raw meat came our way. Yeah, you read that correctly, raw meat. I was really confused by ONLY seeing raw meat on the menu but sure enough, that’s how it works. We got about, oh, I don’t know, 7lbs of raw meat? Never fear though, because in the center of the table we had coals and a grill.

Now that’s authentic BBQ. It’s also a pretty authentic way of trying to get me to throw up nothing but meat and cabbage. Because that is seriously all they ordered.

Four different kinds of meat. And Sesame flavored cabbage (alternatively, hot sauce covered cabbage i.e. Kimchi).

I mentally prepared myself to be throwing up for the rest of the night when my mother ordered me Budo Sour (sour grape drink with a miniscule amount of alcohol) when all of a sudden my HERO steps into the restaurant. Well…more like my host sister. Same difference. She asks me if I need rice and I nod my head bobble head style without trying to sound too obviously desperate. I CAN’T drink without carbs or a miracle and I’ve been SHIT out of miracles as of late.

After filling up on rice my host mother offers me MORE meat. No fucking way. I couldn’t even pretend to do it, especially with the light buzz going on in my head. I pulled out the “I’m MAD HELLA FULL” phrase and sat back unable to move in anything but rollable directions. Host dad asked if I wanted more beer. “That depends…do you want me to vom in your toilet AND shower?” I politely declined the offer and once we prepared to go home it hit me.

I had to fucking bike ride back home. I can BARELY ride my bike sober but buzzed? I was HORRIFIED. Host dad (who had four beers) whizzed past all jolly go lucky while I was freaking out as car after car passed me (because in Japan, everyone is a G and rides in the street). Kind of…okay, definitely repeating to myself “I’m going to die D:” and thankful my host mom didn’t understand, I somehow made it back home without error and realized…

…well…

…it wasn’t that bad. It was kind of nice. Ignoring the “I’m going to die” segment, it was peaceful riding my bike in the not so congested streets of late evening Japan. And now onto homework…!

….

…who am I kidding? I’m totally watching Lord of the Rings!